Friday, October 28, 2011

Time flies ~ embrace it

photo found here

“Where has the time gone? … Time just flies on by ….  I can’t believe another year has come and gone. ..  Time just got away from me."
If you’re like me, you may have said or thought these statements at some point.  You may even say or think them frequently.
The truth is, time is flying by, yet we are the pilots.  We navigate.  We have control over what we choose to do, or not do. 
At times, we allow ourselves to get so busy and overwhelmed.  We fill up, we speed up, and rarely hear the quiet whispers of what really matters.  
When we can really identify our priorities and what’s important in our lives, we can then allow ourselves to say “no” to what gets in our way, so that we can move towards what brings us joy, contentment and satisfaction.
 I first heard the following statement in a workshop over 20 years ago.  It goes like this.  “If you cannot say “NO” ~~ you truly do not know how to say “YES”.  These words still give me the chills.
Isn't it amazing that "No", one of the simplest and shortest words in our language is one of the most difficult words to say. 
When we learn to eliminate the unwanted stuff, people, places, and things from our lives, we can then decide what we want to make room for.  When we can identify and embrace our priorities and focus on what we want more of, we then feel more justified saying “no”, in order to pursue our dreams and goals.
Cheryl Richardson reminds us that learning to say no with grace and love is the key to protect our gift of time.  If saying “no” is difficult for you, here are 3 helpful tips she recommends:

1.       Your self care is always a valid excuse

2.     You don’t need to explain or defend your actions.  Just tell the simple truth.

3.     Doing things out of guilt and obligation is not doing things out of love.
As I sit here and write this post,  I am aware that another month is coming to an end and the start of the new month presents us with new intentions, new beginnings, and new possibilities.

I invite you to take some time today and ask yourself…

What would my life be like if there really were enough hours in each day?

What needs my attention the most at this point in my life?

What do I need to let go of to create more time?

Monday, October 17, 2011

It’s all about the hair ... or is it?

Javier Aranda hair and make-up design

There is so much I can share with you today.  I can write about my recent wheat elimination, the workshops I am facilitating, the amazing people I am attracting into my life, and all the creativity that’s blooming around here.  Instead, I chose to write about my daughter’s recent haircut.

She knew exactly what she wanted.  She had the picture in her hand to show the hairdresser (not the one shown here) and was already feeling just how amazing her new “look” was going to be.  

Instead, there were tears, stomping, text messages to friends (asking for sympathy), and more tears.

We’ve all been there, especially us gals.  Our hair is so much a part of our identity; it’s an extension of who we are and how we want to be seen. Some of us choose to show our authenticity by revealing our shades of grey, while others embellish with colors of the rainbow, tinsel, extensions, and feathers to show who we really are (or want to be).

So, back to my daughter’s tears, the agony she put my husband and me though over the weekend, and her disappointment of having to go to school today with the bangs she does not want.  The bangs that she did want are the ones that hang over to one side and cover one eye.  The truth is, her bangs looks nice.  Actually, I think they look great (when she leaves them alone).  They are not botched up, cut too short or uneven.  She got a good haircut.   

The real issue is, they are not what she visualized for herself.
For my daughter, the issue is all about the bangs.  It’s about her identity.  It’s about how she wants to be seen. 

For me, the issue has very little to do with her bangs.  For me, it’s all about her feelings.  Am I giving her enough space to feel what she needs to feel?  Do I stop telling her how great they look and empathize more?  I know I’ve been present for her.  I’ve listened to her, cuddled with her, and blown and flat ironed the bangs out several times over the weekend.  So, how much time do I allow her to grieve before I tell her to SNAP OUT OF IT?   Really ...  I’m almost there.

The one thing that I do know for sure is that I am glad I resisted putting the “for a special occasion hostess treat” in her lunch box, to help make her feel better, today.  I know she will feel better in her own sweet time.  Hopefully, it will be before the bangs fully grow out.

Friday, October 7, 2011

As the leaf
has let go,
and evolved

I  choose
Let go
of how
of where
of why
of what
I believe

Let go
of the weight
that holds

Let go
of the story
that never ends

 if I continue
to focus
as I have been,
and to believe
how I have been,
then nothing
 in my experience
 will change.