Monday, March 12, 2012

Say “YES" to yourself

Poster from Patti Digh’s recent Newsletter

Patti Digh, amazing author and speaker, recently asked in her latest newsletter, “why is it so much easier to say yes to other people than to ourselves?"  Next, she grants us permission to skip over the why, and to proceed directly to the "practice of saying yes to ourselves”. 

Years ago, I engaged in a workshop about self empowerment which initiated a life changing awareness for me when I heard a statement that went something like this;  If you can't say “no", than you really don't know how to say "yes".  That statement made such a huge impression on me and continues to remind me of the importance of being  grounded in my power, allowing me to know how to really say “YES”.  More imporantly, it has taught me how to say “no” without having to make excuses or feel I have to explain myself. 

I was at a women's gathering recently where the speaker's message was, "No more excuses",  I loved how she gave examples on how we can graciously say “no" to others, and “yes" to ourselves.  A few of her examples went something like this:

I am so honored that you have thought of me to volunteer my time to offer workshops for your organization, however, I am not available to help.  Your organization has such a great following, I’m sure you will find someone who is available to volunteer.
Thank you for thinking of me to help stuff 1000 envelopes for your next charity drive, unfortunately, my schedule is full at this time,  I know your organization does amazing things for so many people, and I am sure you will find someone else who is available to help.

So, you see the speaker’s formula.  Express appreciation.  Say no.  Conclude with a positive statement.   It’s that easy.

I can still remember the excitement bubbling up in my body when the speaker offered that formula.  It felt so freeing, so empowering.  I was actually looking forward to my next opportunity to design my own amazing sentence that would set me free and allow me to be loyal to myself.

Oh, it feels to good to genuinely say "NO" without feeling the need to make excuses.  It opens space for us, without room for guilt.   

Patti invites us to say, “yes" to ourselves for 37 days.  “ See what if feels like to honor yourself, your energy, your need for space and quiet, and whatever you long for.  Practice saying "no" without apology in order to say "yes" with great enthusiasm to yourself." 

What are you going to create for yourself today, by saying, "yes" to you?

Read more about Patti Digh and why she chose 37 days.


  1. I always wanted to know how to say yes to myself
    without being rude to someone. This technique is wonderful. Thanks for sharing your thoghts with us.

    1. Elaine,

      You are so worth all the yeses in the world.
      I cherish you.
      big hugs

  2. I have that bubbly feeling surging and rippling
    inside as I read along
    and am genuinely inspired!
    thanks, oh thanks, for the beautiful ponder:)

    1. Jennifer,

      Your visits always brings bubbles of Joy to my heart.
      I love my visits with you. I always wonder what you are going to share next.
      You are truly amazing, my friend.

  3. This is wonderful! As you know I've been saying yes to myself about making health and fitness my #1 priority these last few weeks. It has meant saying no to lots of other things. I think I've got the hang of it and it is very freeing!

    Thanks for always being such an inspiration! :)

    1. Martha,
      You are truly in inspiration. When we empower ourselves, we empower others.
      I love reading about all all the ways you are saying YES.
      Your are an inspiration.

  4. What a thoughtful and inspiring post. I completely agree that it is far easier to support and say yes to others than it is to do yourself the same favour - that has me pondering all sorts. I think this requires a re-read of your post and a good cup of tea! :-)

    Jem xXx

    1. Jem,

      I’m so glad we’ve connected. I’m looking forward to visiting with you. I love your blog.

  5. Yes, definitely easier to help someone else than to help myself! I'm trying to put myself first more these days and it's been interesting to see what I come up against. I am such a taskmaster! I think I have Patti's book... going to pull it out and enjoy it again a bit today. Thanks, Eydie!

    1. Naomi,

      Yes, pull out Patti’s book and take some time to read, sip tea, and hang out on your comfy chair or sofa. You deserve it.

      Thanks for stopping by and shining your light.

  6. Hi! Found you over at Liv Lane's. What a great reminder--we can stay true to ourselves without being unkind. Grace goes a long way. My mom always called this the "sandwich" approach: compliment, criticism, compliment. Works wonders! Blessings to you today.

    1. Hi Amanda,

      What a nice surprise. Thanks for stopping by and visiting. I was recently introduced to Sprout Magazine when I read Julia Fenrenbacher's blog and saw that her poem was published in it.
      Your magazine is beautiful. I'm sure you are very proud.

      Writing poetry brings much joy to my life. I would love to share one of my poems with your magazine.

      All the best,

  7. This is powerful stuff, Eydie. That feeling of "being grounded in our power" is so energizing and freeing.

    Thank you for sharing your wisdom, my friend.

    Love to you.

    1. Julia,

      Thanks so much for stopping by and shining your light.
      Your presence always brings such JOY to my heart.
      Much Love to you.


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